All I am going to say.

I feel a need to write something. It will be short.

Just because I do not wear my heart on my sleeve, does not mean that I do not have a heart.

Just because I do not write depressing blogs, does not mean that I am not depressed.

It causes me a lot of anquish, stress, and heartache to know that you are suffering. It hurts to know that I have caused that. I will not get into the whole story, nor try to justify or defend my actions. I have done that with you already. It is a private matter. I will not burden anyone else with what is supposed to be my burdens. I harbor no ill will towards you. I harbor no spite towards you. If you need to hate me to get through this, then hate me. But don't say that I am dead to you. That I am the worst person alive. That I am nothing more than a shell of a good former self. And then wonder why I try to give you your space. Right now, I am a cancerous tumor to you and your psyche. If I need to remove myself. Then I will. I don't know what else to say, my mind is jumbled and confused right now. But, I felt a need to say something.